giving this a try

published: 2025.01.18
tagged: girlblogging
by mana

lately, I’ve read quite a few blog entries about blogging, as I’ve found it difficult to motivate myself to do so as of late.

when I was younger, it was much easier to just post whatever online and not worry so much about whatever I said being permanently attached to my online ‘identity.’ I didn’t really care if anyone read it at all, I was mostly just expressing myself out into the void.

these days, that sort of sentiment is so foreign to me as to be alien; I find myself entirely too introspective and self-conscious to be comfortable doing such a thing, but I’m going to give it a go anyway, in the interest of sticking to the plans I’ve made with a good friend to blag more regularly.

part of me feels pretty guilty, making other people worry about me so much… my friend has even written some blog posts after we chatted for awhile about me not really feeling inspired or being too self-conscious and worrying too much about things like ‘what to write about’ and ‘is anyone even going to read this?’

I suppose I have been in kind of a rut over the past few months…the holidays are always kind of difficult for me, emotionally. family has never been something that’s easy for me to think about, not to mention all the people I’ve lost that I am reminded of during this time of year who I’ll never see again.

This sort of emotional environment lends itself to introspection and even depression, I think.

that being said, I have gotten a bit inspired to fill out this website some more, thanks to some surfing I’ve been doing lately, so I suppose if you’re the type to look forward to things, that might be something you could look forward to.

until next time~!